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Writer's pictureBrian

Oh Deer, A Lesson Learned

I was cruising on a beautiful morning up and down my canal roads. The goof balls on sports radio were in my ear, and the sun was beating down. Caught up in all of this action I noticed a lump of floating hair out of the corner of my eye. The hair was bobbing up and down like a bad hair piece, so it caused me to stop for further inspection.

I left the truck and proceeded to investigate the hairy mass. I noticed the hair being light brown like a certain famous person but thought that the candidate was most likely to be attached to a dog. On the approach my trusty pitchfork, which I have now called Excalibur, was unsheathed and extended out so as to roll the animal over. As it rolled a limp neck came to the surface along with four hooves. This floating hair ball was Bambi!

The deer was slightly bigger than a tall dog and had antlers just budding out of it's skull. I moved the deer around but it was very apparent that Excalibur was not going to win the fight if an attempted removal was to take place.

I knew that my faithful steed Silver(my truck) needed to be called upon to help, but I had no chain or rope with me to execute a retrieval. I resolved to let the animal float a little longer in the original spot stuck against a check, and left the scene to return to the hideout to fetch said chain or rope. I chose the rope and returned to the canal.

It was easy enough to attach the rope to Silver, but not so to my deer friend. I tried to lasso the neck, the head and tail. In my efforts I could not catch anything but a front leg. I looped a slip knot onto the leg and jumped back into my ride.

Canal roads are narrow and this kept me from pulling the deer directly out. I was however pulling it along as we rode down stream. I saw a bend ahead and tried to use it to my advantage but the rope broke and his leg popped out of joint, which foiled my plan.  I resolved to try again while backing up for another try. This time with my shortened rope I lassoed a hind leg and and with help of another bend, and a shorter bank, we pulled Bambi out onto dry ground.

This is when I called the Sheriff (Boss) for further help in solving my troubles. The Sheriff instructed me to bring the animal back to the hideout for proper burial. This I did and buried it deep with my power shovel.

As I pause to reflect...I wish to give my regards to my deer friend. RIP Bambi. Next time I will use a chain and another cowboy to pull him out. Consider it a lesson learned.

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